I always hear people saying that happiness is a choice. I’m calling bullsh*t.

First, happiness is not a choice because if it were, everyone would choose it. Everyone would be happy all the time.

In the midst of terrorism, genocide, poverty, abuse, or just run of the mill crushing disappointment with life people would stop and go, Hey! I forgot- happiness is a choice! let me just flip that switch and I’ll be on my way. Doo dee doo dee doo….

The people who say that happiness is a choice feel happy and try to shame everyone else into feeling it, too.

You cannot force yourself to feel a way you do not feel.

Sure, we’d all like to feel happy, but we just don’t a lot of the time. sometimes we’re sad, sometimes we’re bored, sometimes we’re angry – we have a range of emotions. Life happens, and emotions follow shortly thereafter. We’re all doing the best we can with what we have.

There’s nothing wrong with us if we don’t feel happy all of the time. There might be something wrong if we do feel happy all of the time, because that isn’t authentic.

Even those with seemingly perfect lives aren’t robots. They’re human like everyone else, and go through cycles like the rest of us.

I think it’s ridiculous when people post so-called “inspirational” quotes on Facebook like, for every minute you are angry, you lose sixty seconds of happiness.

No sh*t, really? I wasn’t aware of that. Amazing way to look at it. That’s some fancy math as well. By the way, unfriending you.

The “negative” emotions have just as much merit as the positive emotions do. Other people just don’t like it as much when you are going through “negative” emotions, so they try to get you to suppress them in the name of helping.

They’re not helping. If they were helping, they would urge you to get it all out, to express yourself, to really own each and every one of your feelings until those feelings leave you – because the only way to make any uncomfortable thing go away is to embrace it fully.

Other people also like to seem wise pretty often, so they throw unhelpful BS at you to try to convince you that happiness is a choice.

So not only are they lying to themselves, but they’re also feeding their own ego by pretending they know better than you do. That’s a hell of a lot worse than you just feeling sad and minding your own business.

We all have our own unique perspective on the world. Some of us know things and have seen things that others have not. Some of us have been through things that other people can’t imagine. So telling someone that happiness is a choice is not only false, it also insults another person’s life experience as a whole.

People can post whatever they want – but they should never make the mistake of thinking they know more about life than anybody else, or tell someone else how they’re supposed to feel. That’s just not their job. Real wisdom is accepting people as they are – complex feelings and all.

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Why have I been traveling so much? Because I have grown to like and love Malindi, I want to take risks, meet interesting people, challenge myself, explore the world, and learn more about myself in the process. This also helps me tell the story of how interesting Malindi.

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